I was recently divorced and figuring out how to date, and not doing either of those things well. I was no one’s wife. No one’s girlfriend. Someone’s so-so Friday evening. I made a list of all the other things I am.
I am Lily’s mom. Jim and Kathy’s daughter. Andy’s ex-wife, yes, but also his friend.
I was wrapped up in my head and had a hard time communicating anything other than “I’m sad. I’m lonely. I’m small.” After a while, writers block ruined those topics, too. I put writing aside and did all the other things I love.
I ran. I biked. I gardened. I read. I spent incredible times with wonderful friends.
With one such friend, I lost my temper and lashed out unfairly. I was defensive and reactionary.
Alas, I also was passionate. Apologetic. Forgiving and – guess what – forgiven.
A change at work left me scared and uncertain. I heard from many people who reassured me. They said:
You will rock this. You are strong. You are fabulous at whatever you do. I am your fan.
All the times I flounder at the one thing,
I try my damnedest to remember all the things.
I am optimistic. I am grateful. I am loved. I am me.